12-week grief programme

12 week grief programme

Grief not only comes to those who have lost a loved one, but can also apply to relationship break-ups, death of a pet, loss of a job, business or home, career-ending physical injury, or any other sense of loss or massive change through hardship. 

This 12-week programme has been designed from personal experience after the death of my wife in 2011. It includes all the tools I used to help turn the darkest days of my life into the brightest ones. It is not an easy path to take, and it is more of a jump in the deep-end approach rather than a long, drawn-out process. Healing from the shock and pain of such an experience as grief is not something that will be completely solved within 12 weeks. You can only process what is available to process in the moment, so even years later, new aspects of grief can present themselves for you to look at. However, when you have the tools to be able to deal with it, and see the gift in it, you will have the strength to turn a negative feeling into a positive one.

Having family and a supportive community during these times is immensely beneficial, but at the end of the day, when you are lying alone in bed, you realise you are the only one that can walk this path. As much as they may want to, your friends and family can’t take on this burden for you. They cannot walk the path that was designed just for you. 

Experiencing the shock of grief is like having a massive boulder hurled into the pond of your life. It not only causes the chaos of ripple effects throughout your whole existence, but it brings up all the gunk and unpleasant feelings that were lying dormant at the bottom of your pond and brings them all to the surface. One can see this as more hardship on top of the existing grief, but the way I saw it, was an opportunity to deal with it ALL! Everything that was buried deep in my being was now more accessible than ever before. Some of it became low-hanging fruit, some was just a layer of something even bigger, but my whole existence had been stirred. I remember thinking, if I could just find my feet, and have some focus and clarity, I could get through a lifetime of inner work in a much shorter period of time than I ever would have without this catalyst called grief.

Looking back through 20/20 hindsight, I can see how perfectly all the support I needed fell into place when I followed my inspiration of taking the next step, one step at a time. It felt like a greater part of me had somehow already known this was going to happen and had mapped out my journey ahead of time. I felt like I was even being prepared almost a year in advance, as I was inspired to study the very tools that I would need to help me through this “end of days” feeling, that was to arrive at my doorstep.

With the benefit of having gone through this traumatic experience, and with a further 11 years of study and practical application of these tools on myself and my clients, I can attest to their powerful and transformational qualities. While grief is a very personal journey, there are several key areas that apply to most, if not all, who go through this “initiation” in their lives. Some people may be happy with just eliminating the shock and getting a feeling of being back on their feet. Others may want to take the deeper approach I did and go for it “all”. Everyone’s journey through this is so different, so some people may fly through the programme, while others may have more of a slow and steady approach. We will go with whatever pace you are comfortable with, but I will also push you if that is what’s required. 

Here are the 5 steps we will take together in the 12-week programme to help guide you through the initiation of grief…

1. Releasing  shock and trauma from your body.

Grief tends to lodge in the lungs and can make it difficult to breathe. It can leave you feeling so contracted that you can barely function in your day-to-day life. If you have young children to parent (like I did), and/or other responsibilities, like a job or running a business, do you really have time to feel so helpless and powerless? You will learn some simple, but powerful, energy healing techniques, to help release these intense energies from your body. The difference I felt after using one of these techniques was beyond miraculous. I went from feeling like I was in quicksand, while trying to carry the world on my shoulders, to feeling unburdened and on terra firma. My body went from being wound as tight as a ship’s knot to being more relaxed and supple. I had more clarity on what my next step was, and a feeling of hope that had deserted me up until that point.

2. Returning fragmented parts of your soul

As an in-built survival mechanism during times of extreme stress and trauma, our soul/life-force fragments, and splits from the physical body to lessen the impact of the blow. It can remain outside of the body (in the ether) until it feels it is safe to return. Sometimes that doesn’t happen, and the soul part can be lost, confused, or unaware that it needs to come home to the body. This can leave one feeling like there’s a part of them missing, something that in grief can often be confused with the loss of the physical presence of the loved one, pet, job, etc. This soul loss can feel like a void in your being that can’t be filled. Many try to fill it with alcohol, drugs, sex, food, exercise, work, etc., but the full feeling is only ever temporary. When the soul part(s) is/are returned to the body, there can be a sense of aliveness, positive energy, brightness, hope, clarity, fullness, being at home, etc…

3. Dealing with everything else the grief has flushed up.

As described above, grief can be the catalyst to uproot many suppressed or hidden negative emotions, memories, and experiences. This is an ideal time to address these while you’re already in the “healing zone”. They are ripe for exploration and resolution, and I would highly recommend addressing these feelings at this stage. Imagine you had to undergo surgery for one part of your body, and while in there, they discovered something else that needed attention. Wouldn’t it make sense to have it taken care of while you’re already under the knife, than to go through a separate operation?

We will use the many tools I have at my disposal to address each issue as and when they arise.

4. Application of the tools to your everyday life.

Grief can be a very solitary journey and while I can offer you the support you need to a degree, you will have to take the responsibility of working on yourself outside of our sessions. You will receive tools and higher perception to help you deal with, and approach life from, a more empowered place. However, you can only be empowered when you put in the work, so this programme requires immense dedication.

5. Life after grief.

If you can make it this far, you will be faced with the almost inevitable question of, what now? Life will never be the same again. Your loved one is not coming back, and so life needs to be acknowledged from that perspective, so that you can design a new life for yourself (and your loved ones). This can be an equally scary and exciting place to be. You will carry your loved one in your heart, so you are not leaving them behind, rather your connection transcends time and space. They will travel with you on your journey, just in a very different way than before. If you can integrate this new relationship with them, without feeling guilt or regret, then you can use the experience to lift you to new heights in your life. It will be different, it can even be better, but it will never be the same.

This is the stage where you will start building the foundations for a life without the physical presence of your loved one. You will learn how to adjust to this new reality you find yourself in. It will require you to forget everything you thought you ever knew before and be open to new possibilities and miraculous changes. The grief process is the perfect primer for such an adventure. There can be a feeling of, the worst has already happened, so why not just go for it?!

The 12-week programme structure is as follows:

You will have 2 sessions per week for 12 weeks conducted in person or via Zoom.

12 x 1-1 private mentoring sessions (1hr 30 mins) in person or online

12 x 1-1 private Belvaspata Healing of the Heart sessions (remote or in person) (1 hr)

Phone & Email support

Investment is US$3,600 payable up front or 3 x US$1,295 payable over 3 months (once per month). 

Enrolment in the 12-week grief programme is by invitation only, so get in touch with me to book a 15-minute clarity call. Email shane@shaman.ie or call Shane on +1 905 226 9619